Retrospection

Just so you know, this post may not be of the usual kind. This blog is my writing space for good memories as well as a punching bag for experiences or lessons learnt.

I have blogged about how my equation with friends has been till now. A couple of days ago, I was reminiscing about some of my friendly encounters from the past. Now we don't like to judge people by our will or dwell in the past thinking about them, but it mainly happens due to our experiences with such crowds. I realised there have been acquaintances who were and are still genuine in and out. And there have been others who have been otherwise.

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It's the second kind that usually scare me. Like anyone else, I am a kind of person who values her friendships more than anything. A little over-possessive in that sense. This trait comes due to the wonderful friends and the associations from all these years. On some occasions, hordes of emails have been exchanged to be in touch while on others, it's been a matter of a mere hi-bye relation which has stuck through.

What made me ponder was that in every circumstance, my reactions/thoughts/behaviour has been my true self. But the same has not been the case from the other end. What begins as a great start to an ever-lasting friendship turns shorter than hoped for. Has this happened to you before ?

Like in any relationship, even friendship requires efforts to keep it going.

• But what do you do when the efforts evaporate from one side ?
• Does it make sense to cling on to that friendship ?
• Or do we still continue the acquaintance just for the sake of it ?

The more I think about it, I more blurry it gets. And now I have reached such a point where such experiences have taught me a lesson - "To not be myself". I know it sounds crazy but only because at the end of it all in the other cases, the efforts that I put in seem futile to keep the acquaintance going on.

Being on a cautious front from the start helps me to look at the person with a better perspective.

• Have you done or experienced something like this before ?
• How would you deal with such a friendship when you know talking about it to the person to resolve the misunderstanding is not going help ?
• What if, the person is still the same even after the misunderstandings are conveyed and clarified ?